Asher's (baby #6) Birth Story

It's my sweet baby Asher's first birthday! It's taken me a year to feel comfortable sharing his birth story - birthing unexpectedly in a hospital, during covid, without my husband and father of all of my children (who ended up leaving me later that year) - It was a lot to process! It is time to share...

The end of my pregnancy was filled with uncertainty. The thought of giving birth at the hospital during the coronavirus nightmare was giving me so much anxiety. I was having nightmares of my baby being taken away, if I were to cough or pop a fever during labor. At that time, there was talk of babies being taken away from mothers for testing positive, even though that would be the worst possible thing to do to a mother and child in every way.

I was also having symptoms of ICP (intrahepatic cholestasis of pregnancy) again after 2 previous ICP babies, which would mean an induction at 37 weeks of pregnancy, but thankfully I tested negative. 

I was praying daily for a healthy pregnancy and baby and a safe delivery at home. 

Friday morning, May 8th at exactly 37 weeks I was standing in my kitchen and my water broke. I was ecstatic! I knew that meant I didn't have to worry about my ICP coming back or a hospital induction. I could just have my dream water birth in the safety and comfort of my own home with my home birth midwife, doula friend, husband and whoever else I wanted to be there!

I called and let my midwife know, so she could be prepared. I called my husband and mom who were both at work and my doula friend who was at another birth. Contractions started and within the hour they were about 5 minutes apart. I called and let my midwife know, so she could head over. I also called my neighbor who is also my friend, since my husband and mom were both stuck at work and I needed help with my 2 year old. 

My midwife, my neighbor friend, and my mom all showed up at about the same time. We were all excited and chatting and they were keeping me distracted from the intensity of my contractions. Contractions went from being steady at 5 minutes apart to becoming irregular. My midwife decided she would leave for a bit and come back later or when I called her. I tried walking on and off the rest of the evening and even tried pumping, but labor never started back up. As soon as I would sit down contractions would stop. My midwife suggested that I was in mom mode and my body was stalling until I felt at peace to birth. Our mind is powerful like that. She thought I would go into labor overnight when my house was quiet and peaceful and everyone was where they were supposed to be. I ate dinner, took a hot shower and went to bed early. Whenever I woke up to pee, I rubbed clary sage oil on my belly, pelvis and hips and went back to sleep. 

Saturday morning came and no labor. My midwife came over around 9:00am and said we would try some things to get labor going, but that eventually if I didn't, I'd need to go to the hospital for pitocin, because of risk of infection rising after water being broken for so long. 

She gave me an herbal supplement and I pumped for 15 minutes on and 15 minutes off all morning. That afternoon my mom and neighbor friend came over. My neighbor friend and I fast walked multiple times that afternoon. 

My friend, who was also my doula, ended up coming over for emotional support. 

It was that time. 

My midwife thought that I needed to transfer to the hospital and try low dose pitocin. With the hospital's very strict rules of only one support person allowed, and if they went outside they aren't allowed back in, my husband informed me he would not be able to stay inside the whole time, and that I should take someone who would stay in the room with me. At the time, this was devastating to me, but I now know it turned out to be a blessing. Very emotionally, I packed my bag, while my mom and friends prayed with me and braided my hair. I decided I wanted my mom to stay with my babies and to take my friend with me to the hospital. We ate dinner, said our goodbyes, and left. 

We arrived at the hospital Saturday evening. Due to coronavirus, my friend and I both had our temperature checked and no fevers. The nurse was very pushy and once she learned I had previously had a c-section with baby #3, informed me I'd need a c- section since I was a VBAC. My friend and I both looked at her and were like absolutely not. She argued with me for a minute and then left. Thankfully I never saw her again! Then a new nurse came in with the midwife on call. We went over my birth plan and they checked me. I was 5cm and 60% effaced. The hospital midwife thought I was dehydrated and if I I got a bag of fluid I may start labor and not need pitocin. After the bag of fluid, I was having some contractions, but nothing regular. 

Around 12:30am May 10, they started me on low dose pitocin. Contractions finally started coming regularly. I stood and swayed for a while until they became intense. Then I sat on the birthing ball and breathed through each contraction. The midwife came in to check me and said I was 8cm and said that she felt the lower water bag was not ruptured and babies face was right there, so I gave her the go ahead to break the lower bag. I sat back on the birthing ball and showed my friend how to do hip squeezes and she squeezed my hips through each contraction. I felt so relaxed, as I prayed, I was able to go into what felt like a peaceful dream state with each contraction. I never experienced that with my other births. The midwife came back in and asked if I needed to pee or if I felt pushy. I went to pee and made it back to the ball. I felt like I needed to pee again, but when I reached the bathroom I felt the urge to push! She quickly rushed me to the bed and asked what position I wanted to birth in. I said hands and knees, so she helped me on to the bed. My body took over and pushed out my baby. The ring of fire felt so intense and horrible and I just wanted him out and fast, so I pushed hard with my body those last 2 contractions and the midwife caught him and placed him under me into my arms and I rolled over and held him. 

As soon as I held him in my arms I heard his name loud and clear, "Asher." It means blessed, happy one. We didn't have a name yet and I had prayed for God to give me a name, because I was so indecisive and wanted it to be perfect. It was the most beautiful moment!

I layed there and held my beautiful baby boy while the midwife waited for the cord to turn white and stop pulsating. He had a beautiful cord. She asked me if I wanted to cut the cord and I said yes! That was also a first for me, because my husband cut all of our other babies cords. 

Asher Daniel was born on Mother's Day, May 10, 2020 at 3:47am. 8lbs and 20 inches long.

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,  the fruit of the womb a reward.  Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth.  Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate."

Psalm 127:3‭-‬5 

"And of Asher he said, “Most blessed of sons be Asher;"

Deuteronomy 33:24 a

I'm so thankful that everything went well at the hospital. I was so anxious about birthing at the hospital during the coronavirus nightmare. Besides the first nurse I had at check in, and thankfully only had to communicate with her once, everyone was great and respectful of my birthing choices.

I didn't have my dream water birth at home, but he is here and we are both healthy without anything traumatic happening. I don't know what God's reason was, but I feel at peace with everything. 

All of my words are from one year ago, except the bold sections.